


Mass Effect: Renascence

by Eleora



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Death, Eventual Romance, F/M, Falling In Love, Fist Fights, Gun Violence, Oral Sex, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-28
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-11-20 01:20:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11325693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eleora/pseuds/Eleora
Summary: I hate dying. I know that I hate it because I've already died once. The pain doesn't bother me, that's not what hurts the most about dying. What hurts the most is knowing that I was leaving behind my loved ones. And the fact that I'm on a mission that I need to see through. Or so help me- I'll come back again to unleash hell. I'm Milana Rae Shepard, and this is my story.(I don't own Mass Effect or it's characters.)





	1. Chapter 1

Prologue

 

"Shepard."

The Admirals voice pulls me from the haziness of my own mind, forcing me to become more aware. I try to open my mouth to respond, but everything hurts. My left eye is swollen shut, and blood drips down into my already straining right eye. Every breath I take pains me- a pretty good indication that I have cracked and broken ribs. My armor was completely blown off by the blast of a reaper laser, on the run towards the conduit. And where my clothes were ripped and torn, I could see my bruised, burned, and bloodstained skin. I know that if I saw anyone that I knew, they wouldn't be able to recognize me. As much as my body wants to give up. I can't. Not yet.

"Commander!" Hacketts' stentorian voice rings from my earpiece. I attempt to speak again but gibberish comes out instead. "Nothing is happening." He explains. My mind is now on full alert, but my body isn't following. I know I'm on the verge of shutting down. I struggle to push myself up to my feet in a pathetic attempt to walk towards the console. I stagger forward a few steps before plummeting towards the metallic floor again. Slowly, I crawl by the Illusive man's lifeless body. "The crucible is not firing, it must be something on your end." He continues. I can hear the desperation and the fear in his voice, as he speaks to me through the earpiece. Not that I would blame him if he panicked.

Nobody heeded my warnings. Everyone thought I was insane. Well, almost everyone… An image of Garrus, Tali, Liara, Joker and the rest of my crew, flashes through my mind. My heart swells and I choke on a tear-less sob. I know that I'm already dead no matter what. But they still have a chance. A chance that relies on me. I have to keep moving. For them. For my loved ones. I continue to drag my half dead body across the floor, leaving a trail of blood behind me. I grunt as I glance up at the glowing console, fighting to keep my eyes open.

"I don't see…" I manage to squeak out before hissing at the pain and clenching my side. I force myself to reach for the edge of the console so I can hoist myself up. But it's too high… I can't reach. "I'm not sure how to…" I croak before my head falls back down on the cold, hard floor.

"Commander?" Steven's voice becomes softer as my eyelids flutter. A single tear escapes as my eyes close, and I don't have the strength to open them. I get the weird sensation of floating, like, I'm being lifted up. A bright light makes the inside of my lids a bright blood red.

I hate dying.


	2. Mass Effect: Renascence Chapter One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Year: 2183  
> Setting: SSV Normandy SR-1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Just want to let you know that I went back and cleaned the chapter up, and I also added/took away a few extra lines here and there. I was half asleep when I posted this last night, and was appalled when I reread again this morning. Lol Needless to say, it's better now. If you find any mistakes, let me know so I can go back and fix them. Thanks a bunch! :)
> 
> Also! This story is on Wattpad, where you can see pictures of who I imagined would be a great Shepard. And also I'll be posting pictures of other characters, if you want to check it out. I'm still fairly new to Archives of our own, so I'm not entirely sure if I can post pictures on here or not. lol Just hang in there! I'll get the hang of it soon enough.

The metallic doors of the elevator open, waiting for me to step out. I take a deep breath trying to find my happy medium between calm and nervous. I learned long ago that you don't want to go out into a mission, no matter how big or small, too relaxed- you can screw up by under analyzing something or get killed for letting your guard down. You also don't want to go in too nervous- you can overthink something and screw up or you can get to paranoid trying to watch your own back that you don't watch your squads back. Which could mean the difference between life and death.

I make my way towards the cockpit, nodding hello to Dr. Chakwas as I pass by. Joker's voice booms through the speakers. "The Arctus Prime relay is in range. Initiating transmission sequence." He says confidently, giving the rest of the Normandy crew a heads up.

I glide by and weave my way through the buzzing room. Earning a few quick salutes and "Commander's," from some of the crew members. Something about their rushing about unsettles my stomach even more. Well that- and the fact that we have a Council Spectre on board. Something isn't right... Or there's more going on here than everyone seems to realize. Why would a Council Spectre accompany us on a minor mission to test out stealth systems? It just doesn't add up or make any sense. My fist clench together as I continue to make my way towards Joker.

"We are connected. Calculating transit mass and destination." He pauses for a moment. "The relay is hot. Acquiring approach vector." He says in his pilot voice that he's perfected over the years. The closer we approach the mass relay, the more eagerness I hear in his voice. If I weren't so concerned about this mission, I probably would've smiled and shook my head at the man-child piloting the ship. "All stations secure for transit."

The large door to the cockpit is now in sight, it slides open and I'm met with Nihlus' back, and the back of Joker and Kaiden's head. It seems like everywhere I go lately, Nihlus is always there.

I remember when I saw my first turian, it's something that a person couldn't forget. I use my peripheral vision to take in the tall turian's form, saying he's tall is an understatement. Almost all turians typically stand over 6 feet, but Nihlus stands around 7 feet tall. They have two long fingers, and an opposable thumb, each ending with sharp talons. They also have a set of mandibles around their mouth's but their most distinguishing feature is there metallic carapace. It contains traces of thulium. Turian scientists believe this trait evolved as a defense mechanism to protect them against the high solar radiation that infiltrates their home-world's weak magnetic field. Which kind of makes sense I suppose. Any human with working eyes can see that turians are avian. They kind of resemble humanoid birds, or raptors. Which is pretty badass. Anderson once told me that he thought turians reminded him of the evolutionary link between birds and dinosaurs. I want to laugh at the thought, but I manage to keep a straight face.

Nihlus stands straight and proud. Something that all turians seem to know how to do right from the womb. But there's something extra about his stance- something that radiates a shit ton of confidence and badassery. Maybe it's the intimidating white markings that are painted on his red face, that match his armor, or the way his eyes seem to glare even when his face is expressionless. Or maybe it's because he's a Spectre and he knows he's practically untouchable.

I dismiss the thought and listen to Joker as he presses all kinds of buttons, and flips different switches. "The board is green. Approach run has begun." He says as he grips the helm. "Hitting the relay in 3... 2... 1..."

A slight jerk ripples through the Normandy. A side effect of going through a relay. The first time I went through a relay, I threw up, because of the whoozy feeling that comes after. It's like your stomach is trying to catch back up with your ass, and if it doesn't, well... clean up on aisle 12. I've done this so many times now that it's barely noticeable now.

"Thrusters... check. Navigation... check. Internal emissions sink engaged. All systems online. Drift... just under 1500 K." I listen as Joker drones on, and refrain myself from rolling my eyes.

"1500 is good. Your captain will be pleased." Nihlus speaks up. I could listen to turians talk all day. I like the way their subvocals seem to make their voice purr. Almost like a cat. It's soothing. Nihlus turns with his hands still behind his back and leaves the cockpit. As soon as he walks away and is out of earshot Joker speaks.

"I hate that guy." He grumbles. I glance at him and then to the Lieutenant.

"Nihlus gave you a compliment... so you hate him?" Kaiden asks Joker, more amused than confused. I steal a peek at the lieutenant. His jet black hair is slicked back and he's clean-shaven. Even his sideburns are neatly groomed. His dark, thick brows rest over his bright brown eyes. I'm sure his cheekbones and jawline could cut through paper. And if his angular face wasn't handsome enough. He's tall, standing around 6 feet and 3 inches, and you can tell he works-out. Often. Overall he's a good kid, with a good heart and one hell of a biotic. I move to stand closer behind Joker.

"You remember to zip up your jumpsuit on the way out of the restroom? That's good." I frown and glance at Joker for a moment before returning my attention back at the screen. "I just jumped us halfway across the galaxy and hit a target the size of a pinhead. So that's incredible!" He exclaims. My lips tighten into a hard line as I try to keep myself from laughing. For the umpteenth time today, I try to refrain from rolling my eyes at Joker, and it's still early in the day. I shift my stance and manage to regain my composure. "Besides, Spectres are trouble. I don't like having him on board. Call me paranoid." Joker confesses. Seems like I'm not the only one that has a weird feeling about this whole mission.

"You're paranoid." Kaiden says dryly. "The Council helped fund this project. They have a right to send someone to keep an eye on their investment." He explains, sounding confident. I would've believed him if I didn't feel this ugly pit in my stomach. I trust my instincts. They've gotten me out of every situation I've ever had the pleasure of getting myself into... which I'm still not entirely sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

"Yeah, that is the official story." Joker responds. "But only an idiot believes the official story." He says under his breath. I almost didn't hear him. However, I completely agree with him.

"They don't send Spectres on shakedown runs." I inquire calmly, voicing my opinion. Joker nods and turns his face sideways towards the Lieutenant, not taking his eyes off the screen.

"So there's more going on here than the Captains letting on." Joker concludes. Before Kaiden can protest, the intercom beeps and Captain Anderson speaks.

"Joker! Status report." He commands. Joker begins fiddling with the dashboard.

"Just cleared the Mass relay, Captain. Stealth systems engaged. Everything looks solid." Joker reports as he sifts through different statistics on the holographic screen. Kaiden and I exchange a knowing glance. Joker has a habit- no, a super power really, of irking the Captain.

"Good. Find a comm buoy and link us into the network. I want mission reports relayed back to the Alliance brass before we reach Eden Prime." The Captain instructs. I hold my breath hoping Joker keeps his mouth shut. Highly unlikely, but a girl can hope.

"Aye, aye, Captain." He pauses. And I let out the breath I was holding, I'm honestly shocked that he managed to not make the Captai-. "Better brace yourself, sir. Nihlus is headed your way." Aaaannd there it is. This time I do roll my eyes and shake my head.

"He's already here, Lieutenant." Anderson growls through the speaker, I'm guessing through clenched teeth. Kaiden glares at joker and shakes his head at him. Joker stares at the screen with a blank expression, blinking a few times. Idiot... "Tell Commander Shepard to meet me in the comm room for a debriefing." Anderson says after a while. That's just great. Now I have to go speak with him, after Joker annoys him. One of these days I'm going to ring this pilots neck. Joker clears his throat.

"You get that, Commander?" He asks, almost sounding apologetic. Almost.

"Great, you piss the Captain off and now I'm going to pay for it." I sigh, sounding a little harsher than I intended. I turn on my heel, starting for the comm room. No need to keep the already agitated Captain, (thanks to Joker) waiting.

"Pfft. Don't blame me. The Captain is always in a bad mood." Joker pouts.

"Only when he talks to you, Joker." Kaiden chimes in sarcastically.

I practically run towards the comm room, picking up on a few conversations around me. A lot of the crew feels the same way as I do about the mission. I pass by Dr. Chakwas and Corporal Jenkins- young blood eager to get his boots wet. I hear Dr. Chakwas berating him, telling him to calm down and to hone in on his eagerness.

The door to the comm room slides open as I approach it. The first thing I notice is Nihlus... And he's alone. The pit in my stomach just got bigger.

"Commander Shepard." He begins as he turns to face me. "I was hoping you'd get here first. It will give us a chance to talk." He explains calmly. I watch him with curious eyes. Where's Captain Anderson?

"Talk about what?" I ask, pressing him to continue. He gracefully stalks towards the window and looks out.

"I'm interested in this world we're going to- Eden Prime. I've heard it's quite beautiful." His voice is low and deep. Despite looking like a predator that should be at the top of the food chain. I trust him.

"They say it's a paradise." I reply coolly. I've never been to Eden Prime myself, but I've seen pictures, as well as a few vids.

"Yes... a paradise." He says. I detect a hint of irritation in his voice. "Serene. Tranquil. Safe." He says almost mockingly. Maybe my translator is glitching? He looks towards me, his eyes softening. "Eden Prime has become something of a symbol for your people, hasn't it? Proof that humanity cannot only establish colonies across the galaxy, but also protect them." He says. He turns from the window and is standing in front of me in a few strides, leaning forward until his face is level with mine. "But how safe is it, really?" He asks, as our green eyes bore into each other. I frown as he rises to his full height again, and turns away from me. What is he not telling me?

"If you've got something to say, just say it." I declare as I take a step towards him. Now that I know for sure something is wrong. His head turns sideways, showing off his long fringe, but remains facing forward.

"You're people are still newcomers, Milana. The galaxy can be a very dangerous place." His deep sibylline voice warns me. "Is the Alliance truly ready for this?" He asks, now turning to face me with his arms crossed and his head cocked to the side in curiosity. Very bird-like. Before I can answer, the door slides open and Captain Anderson walks in, his expression letting me know that he was deep in thought.

"I think it's about time we told the Commander what's really going on."He says, speaking to Nihlus, but keeping his eyes glued to the floor. He's completely unaware of what Nihlus and I were just discussing. Nihlus stares at me knowingly for a moment longer before answering.

"This mission is far more than a simple shakedown run. Which I'm sure you've already figured out." Nihlus points out. Oh how badly I want to snort and roll my eyes. Of course I figured it out. Half of the whole crew figured it out. I'm a lot of things, but stupid isn't one of them.

"I figured there was something you weren't telling us." I confess to Anderson, as I cross my arms.

"We're making a covert pick-up on Eden Prime. That's why we needed the stealth systems operational." He calmly explains. I feel a prick inside of my chest. He could've told me. Hell! Why am I even here then, if they were just going to keep me in the dark this whole time. Wait- no... Unless they were... Shit...

"I don't like being kept in the dark, Captain. But I'm sure you had a good reason for not telling me sooner." I say trying to keep my tone even. However I could feel my face darken.

"This comes down from the top, Commander." He says as he points a finger at me. "Information strictly on a need to know basis." I uncross my arms and wait for him to continue. "A research team on Eden Prime unearthed some kind of a beacon during an excavation. It was Prothean." He implies. Prothean? Why should it matter? It's like finding a fossil. The Protheans are extinct.

"I thought the Protheans vanished nearly 50,000 thousand years ago." I object.

"Their legacy still remains. The mass effect relays, the Citadel, our ship drives- it's all based on Prothean technology." Nihlus elaborates as he uncrosses his arms.

"This is big, Milana. The last time humanity made a discovery like this, it jumped our technology forward two hundred years." The Captain enunciates in an almost mystified voice. Now I understand the bigger picture. This Prothean beacon could advance our tech even more, or it could be some form of a weapon. Either way, if this fell into the wrong hands- no telling what could happen. "But Eden Prime doesn't have the facilities to handle something like this. We need to bring the beacon back to the Citadel for proper study." He concludes.

Locate the device and call in the Normandy. Fine. Done. I can do that. And while I'm more than confident in my abilities to get the job done. There is also the fact that there is a freaking Spectre standing not even a few feet away from me. This child's play for Nihlus. There are two reasons Nihlus could possibly be here. One. To overlook the mission and make sure we actually do bring the beacon to the Citadel. Or two. He's here to scope out one of us as a potential Spectre candidate. Welp, might as well ask why I'm really here.

"Obviously, this goes beyond mere human interests, Commander. This discovery could affect every species in Council space." Nihlus chimes in grimly. He moves to stand in front of me again, until I have to crane my neck to see his face. "The beacon is not the only reason I'm here, Shepard." My brows furrow and I narrow my eyes at him.

"Nihlus wants to see you in action, Commander. He's here to evaluate you." Anderson speaks up. Well- that answers my unasked question.

"Guess that explains why I bump into him every time I turn around." I surmise, glancing back up at Nihlus who's still staring at me. Turian expressions can be hard to read sometimes, but if you've spent as much time around them as I have, you learn how to read them and pick up on their subtle body gestures. I could tell Nihlus is slightly surprised with me by the way his brow plates subtly rise, and how his mandibles twitch like he wants to smirk. Yeah buddy, I know you've following me.

"The Alliance has been pushing for this for a long time." Anderson begins. I mentally agree with him. "Humanity wants a larger role in shaping interstellar policy. We want more say with the Citadel Council." He adds. "The Spectres represent the Council's power and authority. If they accept a human into their ranks it shows how far the Alliance has come."

"You held off an enemy assault during the Blitz single-handed." Nihlus states with a twinkle in his eye. I fight to shove those gruesome memories back down. All those lives I took that day... No. I focus on Nihlus' words. "You showed not only courage but incredible skill." He adds. "That's why I put your name down as a candidate for the Spectres." Wait- did he just say? I raise a brow at Nihlus. He put my name down?

"Why would a turian want a human in the Spectres?" I ask, still shocked that he mentioned me as a candidate. He makes a weird sound, almost like a snort.

"Not all turians resent humanity. Some of us see the potential of your species. We see what you have to offer to the rest of the galaxy and to the Spectres." He explains as he backs away a few small steps to give my neck a break. "We're an elite group. It's rare to find an individual with the skills we seek." He pauses for a moment, and stares into my eyes intensely. "I don't care that you're human, Shepard. I only care that you can do the job." Moved by his kind words- kind enough for a turian anyways, I look at Anderson for confirmation. There's a proud gleam in his eyes.

"I assume this is good for the Alliance." I state. He nods.

"Earth needs this, Shepard. We're counting on you." He says softly. Although I can hear his "I'm counting on you," in his voice. My heart melts, so does my disposition towards becoming a Spectre. After I turned 18 and joined the Alliance, it became my family. Captain Anderson sort of became a father figure to me. There's no way I can tell him no. So I nod at him, silently accepting the offer.

"I need to see your skills for myself, Commander. Eden Prime will be the first of several missions together." Nihlus explains, his voice humming.

"You'll be in charge of the ground team. Secure the beacon and get it onto the ship ASAP. Nihlus will accompany you to observe the mission." Anderson says as he gestures towards the turian.

They both debrief me on why the beacon is so important, warning me about hostiles that could possibly attack from the terminus systems, and ultimately cause war to break out. I ask some more questions about the Protheans, they don't tell me anything that I don't already know. Despite being a simple mission, I can't help but feel uneasy about it- more so than usual.

"Alright, just give the word, Captain." I say to let Anderson know that I'm fully prepared and ready to go. He nods at me.

"We should be getting close to Eden-"

"Captain!" Jokers worried voice interrupts him from the intercom. "We have a problem." Anderson's shoulders tense up, and he frowns.

"What's wrong, Joker?" The Captain asks. Nihlus remains calm as he waits for Joker to continue.

"Transmission from Eden Prime, sir. You better see this!" Joker says as a holographic screen pulls up and shows a paused vid. All three of us walk towards the screen. The video begins to play, and I have to stop myself from covering my ears. It's loud with all the gunfire and screaming. Explosions go off in the background as a woman approaches the camera, telling the person to get down. Everything is unclear, the camera won't stop shaking. I glance at Anderson, his and Nihlus' eyes are glued to the screen.

"We're under attack! Taking heavy casualties. I repeat taking casualties!" I frown at the soldiers in combat. They need help and there's nothing I can do but watch helplessly. What in the hell is going on? "We can't... argh!... -eed evac!" He yells. "They came out of nowhere. We need-" Someone or something kills him and the camera falls again, showing multiple soldiers with pale and bloody faces, and wide, terrified eyes. The camera moves again and shows a huge, black ship with finger like appendages sticking out of it. It's something straight out of a horror vid. My heart rate spikes and my lips part as I take a step closer to the screen. What the hell is that thing? Another explosion goes off and the screen turns to static.

"Everything cuts out after that. No comm traffic at all. Just goes dead. There's nothing." Jokers voice snaps me out of my daze, and I shift my attention back to Nihlus and the Captain. Both are wearing grave and serious expressions.

"Reverse and hold at 38.5." The captain instructs Joker. Nihlus' mandibles slowly fidget as he stares at the screen. A turian habit that they do when they're either deep in thought or nervous.

The screen rewinds and pauses on the ship. Whatever that thing is- it's absolutely fucking terrifying.

"Status report!" Anderson shouts.

"17 minutes out, captain. No other Alliance ships in the area." Joker responds. It's quiet for a moment. Anderson is thinking about what to do.

"Take us in, Joker. Fast and quiet." He commands. "This mission just got a lot more complicated." He mutters grimly.

Nihlus chimes in, putting in his expertise. "A small strike team can move quickly without drawing attention. It's our best chance to secure the beacon." He insists. I agree with him, Anderson seems to too.

"Grab your gear and meet us in the Cargo hold. Tell Alenko and Jenkins to suit up, Commander. You're going in." Anderson commands as he walks to stand in front of me. Nihlus is already out the door. I nod and salute him, before stealing one last glance at the terrifying ship. Except now I don't feel any fear- all I feel is anger. Whatever this UFO is, it killed my brothers, my sisters, and innocent people. I want to avenge them. Anderson places a firm hand on my shoulder, my attention going back to him. He gives me a slight nod and then gives me a hug.

"No heroics. Get out there and get the job done, safely. That's an order." He says softly. I break the hug to look up at him.

"Yes sir." I turn to walk out of the comm room to find Alenko and Jenkins. Looks like I was right, Alenko was wrong, and Jenkins is going to get the action he wanted. Hopefully, he'll learn... I gather the two men and we rush to the Cargo hold as I fill them in on the current situation.

Anderson joins up with us a while later. My squad is ready to go.

"Your team's the muscle in this operation, Commander. Go in heavy and head straight for the dig site." Anderson briefs us. Kaiden speaks up.

"What about survivors, Captain?" He asks. I was wondering the same thing. Anderson looks away for a moment and frowns.

"Helping survivors is a secondary objective. The beacon is our top priority." He finally answers. Like hell it is! The whole reason I joined the Alliance was to help people. To be the kind of person I needed when I was younger. I can feel Kaiden stiffen next to me. He doesn't seem to agree with the Captain either. I can understand the Captain's reasoning and understand his decision, albeit it's a stupidass decision, I think he knows that I won't listen to him anyways. I'll get the job done, but I'll do it the right way.

"Approaching drop point one." Joker's voice fills the room. Nihlus approaches us as the hangar door opens. He loads his pistol without looking, wearing a serious expression. He looks as badass as ever. Jenkins turns to Nihlus.

"Nihlus? You're coming with us?" He asks with awe in his already eager voice. I may or may not have forgotten to mention to them that I was a Spectre candidate, and Nihlus was here to scope me out. But that's not the important thing here. Nihlus doesn't even so much as look at him.

"I move faster on my own." He says coolly, throwing me a quick glance before leaping out of the Normandy. I can't help but grin. Showoff.

"Nihlus will scout out ahead. He'll feed you status reports throughout the mission, otherwise, I want radio silence." Captain Anderson implores.

"We've got his back, Captain." I reassure him, confidently. He nods giving me a small smile.

"The mission is yours now, Commander. Good luck."


	3. Mass Effect: Renascence Chapter Two

I watch as the Normandy quickly disappears behind the cover of the mountains, and walk towards the edge of the cliff. I'm met with a heart wrenching sight. Eden Prime looks nothing like in the pictures or vids. It's not the lush, green, and bountiful paradise that everyone said it was. The sky is painted a blood red, and ash falls from the sky like a deathly snow. Whatever Eden Prime once was, now isn't.

"Oh God... what happened here?"Jenkins whispers, his eyes filled with silent horror. I restrain myself from grabbing him by the collar and screaming in his face. Did he still want that action he was so desperately craving not even an hour ago? I hope this opens his eyes and he sees the bigger picture.

"Smells like smoke and death." Kaiden says quietly. "Eden Prime will never be the same again." I know he's taking it as hard as I am. His words squeeze my heart and toughen my resolve, giving me the incentive to murder the bastards that did this.

I take a deep breath, and exhale, before turning to my squad. "Alrighty, boys. Keep your eyes sharp." I twirl two fingers in the air, "Move out."

We move through the maze of rocks, running into weird floaty creatures that Jenkins calls, "Gasbags." He assures us that they're completely harmless, so we ignore them and press on.

We come across a couple of smoking corpses and my heart sinks. Jenkins takes in the sight and immediately turns away to throw up. The stench that fills the air almost causes me to gag. Kaiden stares at the bodies in silence. Devastating things like this is nothing new to us vets, but do you really get used to sights like this? No. Not really. They'll always make your blood run cold, to the point where you freeze and can't move. But you have to fight that feeling and press on. If you can't overcome this feeling, then you shouldn't be in the Alliance. I move towards the bodies and kneel down, rummaging around trying to find some form of identification... but they're burnt beyond recognition. I stand and turn to my squad shaking my head.

"Nothing..." I say as I walk past them. Kaiden turns to follow me, but Jenkins is still rooted in his spot. I stop and call for him, but he doesn't move. I march up to him and swing him around to face me. "Hey! You've got to get it together soldier. We have a mission that we need to see through." I say keeping my voice low. Jenkins face is pale, and he can't look me in the eye. "Are we going to have a problem here? Do I need to patch in Joker and get him to come pick you up?" Jenkins shakes his head.

"N-no ma'am, Commander!" He stutters, as he regains a little of his composure. I study him for a minute, feeling wary. If he's not up to the task, not only is he putting himself in danger, he's putting Kaiden and I in danger. I glance at Kaiden who seems to understand the predicament. He gives me a slight but reassuring nod. Not feeling good about this, I twirl my fingers in the air again. We continue to navigate our way to the dig site.

As we prowl the rocky maze, red flags go up in my mind. I feel in the pit of my stomach that something's not right. I pull up a fist, halting my squad and head for cover. Both Kaiden and Jenkins follow my lead and duck for cover as well, waiting for my signal. I glare at the path up ahead. It's quiet. Too quiet. I signal them to move forward, while staying under cover. I move first to my next position, then Kaiden. Jenkins moves to the next spot but he's not scanning ahead. Jenkins doesn't even have the chance scream as three drones fly out of nowhere and rip him to shreds.

"Noo!" I yell as I aim my pistol at the drones, firing away. By the time Kaiden can get a shot in, I destroy two of the three drones. Kaiden gets the last drone as I make a beeline to Jenkins lifeless body. I drop to my knees and scramble to find a pulse, but there isn't one.

"Shit!" I cuss out loud. Kaiden places a hand on my shoulder. "I knew something was going to go wrong, and yet I still went ahead and pressed him. Fuck!" Kaiden's grip on my shoulder tightens.

"They ripped right through his shields, Commander. You warned us that there was danger, you did everything right. Jenkins just couldn't handle it." He says softly. He glances around every few seconds, scanning the area for any danger. He's right. I slide my hand over Jenkins eyelids, closing them before I pick myself up and check my pistol.

"We'll see that he receives a proper service once the mission is complete." I say solemnly. I wait until Kaiden is looking me straight in the eyes. "But I need you to stay focused."

Kaiden eyes soften and he nods, "Aye, aye, ma'am." We move Jenkins body under some bushes and trudge further along the path, keeping an eye out for more of those damn drones. We eventually run into a few more, but it's nothing that Kaiden and I couldn't handle. After we finish them off Nihlus patches in telling me that he'll meet us at the dig site.

Something catches Kaiden's eye and he points at something off in the distance. I see it now too. A woman dressed in white and pink armor is running in our direction. She trips over something and falls to the ground. As soon as Kaiden and I hear gunshots, we take off after her. She manages to shoot the down the drones that were chasing her, and she takes cover behind a nearby boulder. A metallic head pokes it's head from around the boulder and I hesitate. Is that a- no... it can't be. Can it? Geth.

Kaiden and I open fire, taking cover behind the boulders too. The woman is hunched over, panting, trying to catch her breath. Kaiden and I take out the two Geth and scan the perimeter before returning to the woman. I notice that she's the same woman from the vid from earlier. The one that told the camera to get down.

"Thanks for your help. I didn't think I was going to make it." She says between her labored breaths. Kaiden offers her his canteen and she gladly accepts it. She takes a couple of swigs before handing it back. She nods her thanks to Kaiden and wipes her chin with the back of her hand, before turning to face me. "Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams of the 212. You the one in charge here, ma'am?" She asks, jumping straight to the point. I like her already.

"Commander Shepard, Alliance Navy." I say as I shake her hand. I nod at her, "Are you wounded Williams?" I ask as I eye her armor, noticing that it's covered in blood splotches. She shifts her weight from one foot to the other and shakes her head.

"Just a few scrapes and burns. Nothing serious." She insists, her shoulders slightly droop. "The others aren't so lucky." She mutters in a quiet voice. "Oh man... We were patrolling the perimeter when the attack hit." She walks forward a few steps and points at something off in the distance. "We tried to get off a distress call, but they cut off our communications. I've been fighting for my life ever since." My brows furrow together.

"Where's the rest of your crew?" I ask her, as Kaiden continues to scope out the area. She frowns and looks down.

"We tried to double back to the beacon. But we walked into an ambush. I don't think any of the others..." She pauses for a moment as the gravity of situation hits her. "I think I'm the only one left." She finally says, her pretty face twisted into a regretful frown.

"This isn't your fault, Williams. You couldn't have done anything to save them." I murmur, thinking back to what Kaiden told me only a few moments ago.

"Yes ma'am." She whispers. "We held our position as long as we could. Until the geth overwhelmed us."

"The geth haven't been seen outside the Veil in nearly 200 hundred years. Why are they here now?" Kaiden chimes in.

Ashley shrugs, "They must have come for the beacon. The dig site is close. Just over that rise. It might still be there." She explains as she points towards the site. She knows her way around here, surely she could help us and join me since we're down a man. If she's been fighting since we got that transmission, she must be a hell of a soldier.

"We could use your help, Williams." I confess. The flames in her eyes burn brighter and she salutes me.

"Aye, aye ma'am!" She says as she readies her gun. "It's time for payback." She growls. I use her intensity to fuel my own.

"Move out!" I command. Feeling a little better now that we have more eyes to watch each other's back. My mind races as I try to make sense of everything that's happened. I wrack my brain trying to remember what I learned about the geth all those years ago. The quarians created them for cheap labor, until the geth turned on the quarians. They all but disappeared around 200 hundred years ago, like Kaiden mentioned. So why are they here, if not for the beacon? What do they want with it?

I shake my head to clear my thoughts, I need to focus on the mission. I notice a large high tech spike sticking up from the ground. My eyes trail up the spike and for the second time today, my heart stops. At the top of the spikes, were humans. They were impaled through the chest and just dangling at the top. A tactic that a ruthless, and soulless warlord would do to scare away his enemies.

"The geth are doing this." Ashley comments, as I stare at the person at the top. I don't say anything, and press forward. There are no words. As we approach the dig site, there are a few more geth that we gun down. It only confirms my suspicion that they're here for the beacon.

"Huh..." I look at Ashley, as she stares at the center of the site. "This is the dig site. The beacon was right here." She points at the freshly disturbed dirt.

"Someone moved it." I say dryly. As I examine the hole in the ground.

"By who? Our side or the geth?" Kaiden asks.

"Hard to say." Ashley shrugs. "Maybe we'll know more after we check out the research camp."

"You think anyone got out of here alive?" I question Ashley.

"If they were lucky. Maybe hiding up in the camp." She answers me hopefully. "It's just at the top of this ridge. Up the ramps." She motions towards the ramps and waits for my signal. A moment later Nihlus is speaking to me through my earpiece.

"Change of plans, Shepard. There's a small spaceport up ahead." I reach for my earpiece and hold it firmly against my ear. "I want to check it out. I'll wait for you there."

"Copy that." I respond, before turning to Kaiden and Ashley to fill them in. We run up the ramp and Ashley speaks as she sees the smoke.

"They hit the camp pretty hard." She says quietly.

"It looks like a good place for an ambush, keep your guard up." Kaiden insists. I agree and nod at him as we cautiously stalk through the camp. I take in our surroundings, everything is destroyed. A high pitched scream fills the air.

"Oh God they're still alive!" Kaiden cries out. I follow his line of sight and see one of the spikes slowly go down. There's a person on it, except they're blue, and look like they've been integrated with tech. The abomination struggles to get off the spike, screeching angrily.

"What the fuck did the geth do to them?" Ashley whispers horrified. My pistol is already aiming at the creature firing as two more spike begin to lower more of those things. Ashley and Kaiden finish the other two off before their feet even touch the ground.

"Now we know what those spike are for... turning our own dead against us." Kaiden says grimly. I stare at them for a moment sending up silent apologies and prayers. Whatever the fuck is going on, I'm ending it. My gaze falls on a building that's still standing. And I could've sworn I saw a slight movement through the shades of the window. I narrow my eyes at the door, and see that it's locked. I'm pretty sure I can hack it...

The door slides open and I carefully poke my head inside.

"Humans! Thank the Maker!" A frightened woman exclaims. Maker? I've heard of an old religion that our ancestors used to follow. Back during the medieval times, when dragons and demons existed. I'm not entirely familiar with the subject, I only know of the Maker, and some lady named Andraste. There was also something about a warden, a champion, and a herald. It's an ancient religion that died out long ago. But it seems it still has a few followers left.

"Hurry! Close the door! Before they come back!" A man cowering in the corner hisses. Something is wrong with the man. Like, he's been broken. I give him a warm smile and hold up my hands.

"Don't worry. We'll protect you." I murmur, my voice warm and calm.

"Dr. Warren? The one in charge of the excavation?" Ashley asks, capturing my attention from the frightened man. "Do you know what happened to the beacon?" The doctor nods nervously.

"They moved it to the spaceport this morning. Manuel and I stayed behind to help pack up the camp." She replies as she fidgets with her fingers anxiously. "When the attack came, the marines held them off long enough for us to hide. They gave their lives to save us."

"No one is saved. The age of humanity is ended. Soon, only ruin and corpses will remain." Manuel whimpers as he twitches around.

"What's wrong with your assistant?" Kaiden queries with a raised brow. Dr. Warren sighs.

"Manuel has a brilliant mind, but he's always been a bit unstable... Genius and madness are two sides of the same coin." Dr. Warren concedes, giving her friend a sad smile.

 

"Is it madness to see the future? To see the destruction rushing towards us? To understand there is no hope? No, I am not mad. I'm the only sane one still left!" He says running his hand over his head repeatedly, and staring at the ground with wide eyes.

"I gave him an extra dose of his meds after the attack." Dr. Warren admits after Manuel finishes his rant. I ask her if she could tell me anything more about the beacon. She mentions that it's a remarkably well-preserved data module of some type, from a galaxy-wide communications network. She lets me know that anything could be locked inside. New technologies, groundbreaking medical advances, weapon schematics- anything is possible.

"We have awakened the heart of evil. Awakened the beast. Unleashed the darkness." Manuel's voice goes low. I shake my head and frown.

"Don't worry about the geth, Manuel. We'll take them down." I reassure him. He violently shakes his head.

"No! Not the geth. They're agents of the destroyers. Bringer of darkness. Herald of our extinction!" Manuel's words send an involuntary shiver down my spine. I didn't want to admit it but everything that Manuel has said, has chilled me to my core. Kaiden clears his throat after a moment of silence.

"By any chance, did you notice a turian in the area?" He asks Dr. Warren.

"I saw him! The prophet. Leader of the enemy. He was here, before the attack." Manuel blurts out. I don't know why, but I know he's not talking about Nihlus. Ashley makes a weird noise and crosses her arms.

"That's impossible. Nihlus was with us on the Normandy before the attack. He couldn't have been here." Kaiden argues. I nod at him.

"I know, Lieutenant." I declare. Suddenly we hear a gunshot, and my earpiece whines in my ear. I shake my head and look to Kaiden with a worried expression. "Nihlus." I breathe. "Stay here and lock the door. We'll send someone for you." I stress to Dr. Warren. She nods with a wary expression. I sprint out the door with Ashley and Kaiden on my heels, and we race towards the spaceport.


	4. Mass Effect: Renascence Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry for taking a while to update... I was going to post something yesterday, but I had a wedding to go to on Saturday, and was nursing a hangover all of Sunday. lol The wedding was beautiful! The happy couple is at Disneyland having the time of their life. Yay! 
> 
> So to make it up to you, I'll actually be posting two chapters today! So keep an eye out for then next chapter in a few hours. Anyways, hope you enjoy! Ciao, darlings. ;)

We round the corner of the wall of rocks and stop dead in our tracks. A couple miles away, the black ship from the transmission video is lifting off the ground. And it's even more terrifying in person.

"What the hell is that!?" Kaiden gasps. He didn't see the vid, this is his first time seeing this- this thing. I can only imagine what's going through his mind. We watch in silent horror as it continues to rise higher and higher until the thick mixture of red clouds, dust and ash shield it from our view. I glance at Ashley, her eyes are wide, her face is pale, and her breaths are quick and shallow. She feels me staring at her and her eyes meet mine. Something unspoken flows between us- understanding. This thing killed her squad mates, and demolished most of Eden Prime. She is fearful of the beast, and she has every right to be. "Heads up, Commander!" Kaiden yells as I turn in time to see more of those spikes lowering with those abominations squirming on them. I also see a few geth patrolling the spaceport. I glance at Ashley hoping that this won't be another incident like with Jenkins. No, her gun is locked, loaded, and already scoping out the enemies.

We charge in heavy, taking down the dead that get too close to us, while taking out the geth troopers. After a few minutes of silence, we cautiously continue towards the spaceport, ascending the stairs. Behind a few crates we spot Nihlus lying on the ground. My heart rate spikes as I dart towards the motionless turian, falling to my knees. I notice the puddle of blue blood that surrounds him, and spot a bullet hole on the back of his head, under his fringe. Someone shot him in close proximity... he was near someone with his guard down. Spectres don't let their guard down, only when they're with someone they trust implicitly. Someone either got the drop on him, which is highly unlikely. Nihlus has been at this for a very long time, he's the best of the best. Or... someone betrayed him... but who?

I roll him over and close his eyes, just like how I did with Jenkins. I squeeze my eyes shut tightly, sending up a silent prayer to the spirits, asking them to watch over Nihlus. Turians have absolute freedom to practice whichever religion they choose to, as long as it doesn't affect anyone's abilities to perform their duty. Most turians, however, believe that groups and areas have "spirits" that transcend the individual. For instance, a military unit would be considered to have a literal spirit that embodies the honor and courage it has displayed. While a city's spirit reflects the accomplishments and industry of its residents. Or like how an ancient tree's spirit reflects the beauty and tranquility of the area it grows within. These spirits are neither good or evil, and they can't affect the world but they can inspire the living, so to speak. I just hope Nihlus finds peace... because I'm gonna make sure the bastard that did this, doesn't.

"Something's moving! Over behind those crates!" Ashley's voice makes my eyes snap open, and jump up with gun at the ready.

"Don't s-shoot! I'm human, like you!" A wary man cries out, as he slowly comes out from hiding with his hands up in the air. I quickly lower my gun. Son of a-

"Sneaking up on us like that nearly got you killed!" I spat at him. His eyes widen a little more and he nervously looks away.

"I... I'm sorry. I was hiding. From those creatures." He says quietly. He slowly lowers his hands, letting them drop to his side. "My name is Powell." He says after a moment of silence. He rubs the back of his neck, and glances at Nihlus' body. "I saw what happened to that turian." He whimpers. "The other one shot him." I feel my brows furrow together angrily.

"I need to know how Nihlus died." I press him. His eyes meet my steady gaze as he explains what happened.

"The other one got here first. He was waiting when your friend showed up. He called him Saren. I think they knew each other." He says softly, still coming out of his initial shock. 'Saren.' I know that name, but I can't remember from where. Doesn't matter. He's going to pay and hell is coming after him. "Your friend seemed to relax. He let his guard down... and Saren killed him. Shot him in cold blood." I shake my head, just like I thought...

"Where'd Saren go after he killed Nihlus?" I ask trying not to take my anger out on him. He points to the cargo train.

"Jumped on the train and headed over to the other platform. Probably going after that damn beacon." He sighs. "I knew that beacon was trouble. Everything's gone to hell since we found it. That damn mother ship showed up, then the attack happened..." His eyes fall to the ground. "They killed everyone. Everyone! If I hadn't been behind the crates I'd be dead, too..." His eyes are filled with sorrow and regret. I frown at him.

"How come you're the only one that survived? Why didn't anyone else hide with you?" I demand. His eyes don't reach mine.

"They never had the chance." He says somberly. "I... I was already behind the crates when the geth started attacking."

"Wait a minute." Kaiden shakes head and points a finger at Powell. "You were hiding behind the crates before the attack?" He asks suspiciously. Powell's sorrowful expression deepens.

"I... sometimes need a nap to get through my shift. So I sneak off behind the crates, and catch 40 winks where the supervisor can't find me." Powell says shamefully. I grimace at him.

"You survived because you're lazy?" Ashley hisses and takes a step towards the now frightened man. I hold my arm out in front of Ashley.

"Easy Williams." I grumble, trying to get her to stand down. I'm just as flabbergasted as she is at the man. After Ashley calms down a bit I refocus my attention on the man. "If you hadn't snuck off for that nap you'd probably be dead- just like all the others." I stare at Powell, holding his gaze. "By some miracle, you've been giving a chance, Powell. Don't waste it."

His shoulders droop, "Yeah. Yeah, I guess. I don't really want to think about it." I press him for more information about the attack and the ship. He tells us that he thinks the geth came from the ship. He also says that the ship descended fast, and then the next thing they knew geth were swarming the place.

"Is there anything else you can tell me about the beacon?" He shakes his head at me. "We need to find it before it's too late," I explain. He points to the cargo train.

"Take the train. That's where the other turian went." I nod my thanks to him.

"Return to the camp, and go to the only building left standing. Inside you'll find Dr. Warren and Manuel. Wait there with them until help arrives." I command. "We cleared a path, you shouldn't run into any danger."

"Yeah, okay. I need to get away from all this." He says before turning and sprinting away towards the camp. Ashley snorts and grumbles.

"You're welcome, bastard." She says under her breath. Kaiden and I remain silent. I take one last sorrowful look at Nihlus before heading towards the train.

We run into trouble on our way to the train, a bunch of geth were stationed there to guard it. We move our way up the cart, having to take cover behind crates as we slowly advance forward taking out the geth, and evading their attacks. We make it to the controls and Kaiden gets to work pressing different buttons, and the train begins to lurch forward.

The train comes to a stop and we get off with caution. We spot a huge white geth crouched over, messing with something in front of it. It kind of looks like a- bomb! "Quickly take out those geth as I override the bombs with my omni-tool!" I shout at my squad.

"Yes, ma'am!" Kaiden and Ashley shout in unison, as they start cutting down the geth. I run towards the bomb sliding on my knees in front of it. My omni-tool comes to life and I scan the bomb, it beeps letting me know that it's done and that there are three more other demolition charges still remaining. I only have 5 more minutes until they detonate. There's no way I'll find the other three in time.

"There are three more charges! Split up, and shut them down!" I yell at my squad, as I shoot down a geth. The next few minutes seem to drag on forever. But we each manage to find a bomb and disarm it.

Across the bridge I see Kaiden is kneeled down, hovering over a bomb and examining his omni-tool as it shuts down the demolition charge. I notice a geth slowly creeping up on him. Before I can aim my pistol at the geth, or yell at Kaiden to warn him. Ashley tackles the geth and furiously begins pummeling it with at first, the butt of her gun, but then she drops it and begins punching the machine with her fists. Alternating her hands. By the time I cross the bridge to reach her, Kaiden is dragging her away from the mangled geth. Ashley is screaming, as Kaiden struggles to hold her back and I notice her bloody hands... she punched away her armored gloves as she attacked the bot. I glance at the geth and take note of it's dented and deformed head. Ashley is still wailing, and fighting against Kaiden. I march over to her and Kaiden, cock my hand back, and slap the shit out of her.

She blinks a few times and stops struggling against the Lieutenants' tight grip. Her breathing is heavy and tears streak her face.

"Enough!" I exclaim and hold her fiery gaze with my own. Fire snuffing out fire. Her breathing slows and she looks away apologetically. The imprint of my hand is now starting to form on her cheek, and I know it stings.

"Yes, ma'am. Sorry, Commander... " She croaks. "It's just.. It's..." She struggles.

"I know, Ashley... I know..." I say quietly. If anyone in the world knows how she feels- I do. Her brothers and sister were slaughtered in front of her, and she couldn't do anything to help them. And to make it even worse, she's the only one that survived. I know she doesn't understand why, and it kills her not understanding why or how the rest of her squad shared a different fate than her. Kaiden picks up her gun and hands it to her.

"Thanks." She says as she takes it from him. She gives him a small nod.

"Are we good here?" I ask as I eye my team. They both stand straight and nod.

"Yes, Commander!" They both say in unison. I nod and study my surroundings. All the bombs were disabled, and there were no sign of geth. I step past them and move forward. The beacon has to be close by.

We find some stairs that go down to a different platform, and see more of those spikes. They begin to lower the dead down, as even more geth show up. It's a long, hard fight. But the Lieutenant, Chief, and I hold our own. We carefully venture forward and see why this area was heavily guarded. I press my finger to my earpiece.

"Normandy, the beacon is secure. Request immediate evac." I say as I turn to look up at the sky, where the Normandy should be coming from. Kaiden and Ashley speak with each other as I repeat for an immediate evacuation.

"Aye, aye, Commander. We'll be there in 5." Joker says through the earpiece.

"Copy that." I reply as Ashley walks up beside me and begins to mutter an apology for her behavior earlier. She's abruptly interrupted by a groan from Kaiden as the beacon lights up and begins pulling him closer towards it. Kaiden's feet are dragging against the floor as he fights the invisible force that tugs on him. Before a coherent thought crosses my mind, I push Ashley out of my way, and dive towards Lieutenant Alenko. I wrap my arms around him, and throw him away from the beacon. The invisible force moves from him to me and overwhelms me. It's almost painful, as my body fights with it. I hear Kaiden call out my name. Suddenly, my body is hovering a few feet off the ground and everything goes dark.

"No! Don't touch her! It's too dangerous!" Ashley yells, even though her voice sounds so distant.

I let out a blood curdling scream, as disturbing images burn themselves into my mind. Everything is on fire, explosions and the screams of innocents fill my mind. Geth swarm in large groups, and destroy everything. Then a fiery force shoves me back and my whole world goes silent.


	5. Mass Effect: Renascence Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! Sorry if it's kind of slow. It will pick up! I promise. Also sorry for any errors, I don't have a beta. I'll try to go back and clean it up later. Hope you still enjoy!

Everything is blurry at first as I come to. The first thing I notice is the dull ache in my head. It feels similar to a headache. 

“Doctor? Doctor Chakwas? I think she’s waking up.” Kaidens anxious voice fills the silence. I raise my head, blinking away the blurriness, and sit up as I swing my legs over the edge of the operation table. 

“You had us worried the, Shepard. How are you feeling?” She asks her voice calm and professional. Kaiden is standing behind me with a concerned expression with his arms crossed, as he patiently waits for my answer.

“Minor throbbing. Nothing serious.” I croak, and try to clear my throat. It’s scratchy and a little sore. Probably from all the screaming I did. “How long was I out?” I ask my voice still raspy. 

“About 15 hours.” She replies. My eyes widen at the response. 15 hours? Jesus… I’m not hooked up to any machines, no bandages, I suppose I’m alright. I keep my composure and continue to listen to Dr. Chakwas. “Something happened down there with the beacon, I think.”

“It’s my fault. I must’ve triggered some kind of security field when I approached it.” He says with a regretful expression that melts my heart. “You had to push me out of the way.” His smoky voice is gentle and full of sadness. I shake my head at him. How was he supposed to know that something like that would happen? He didn’t even touch it, he merely walked by the damn thing. 

“Kaiden…” I say softly. “You had no way to know what would happen. It’s alright.” I murmur and give him a small smile. Something in his eyes shift, and returns my smile with one of his own. It catches me off guard, I think this is the first time I’ve ever seen the Lieutenant smile. It’s nice. Dr. Chakwas pulls me from my thoughts of Kaiden’s smile. 

“Actually, we don’t even know what set it off. Unfortunately, we’ll never get the chance to find out.” I look at her and frown. Well that’s a bummer. Because if we ever find another one of these things, I want to know what not to do around it. I rub the back of my sore neck, and roll my shoulders. Damn, my whole body is sore.

“The beacon exploded. A system overload, maybe. The blast knocked you cold. Williams and I had to carry you back here to the ship.” Kaiden explains as he moves around the table to stand next to the doctor. 

“Thanks, I appreciate it.” I nod at him. He nods and stares intently as another smile tugs at the corners of his lips. 

“Of course, Commander.” He insists. Dr. Chakwas crosses her arms. 

“Physically, you’re fine. But I detected some unusual brain activity, abnormal beta waves.” She explains to me as she eyes me up and down with her doctor stare. “I also noticed an increase in your rapid eye movement, signs typically associated with intense dreaming.” I look down at the metallic floor. I wasn’t dreaming… Whatever etched itself into my brain felt real. Like they were visions of past events. Warnings, almost. 

“I saw…” I pause, struggling to search for the right words, but I couldn’t find any. “I’m not sure what I saw. Death. Destruction. Nothing’s really clear.” I finally say after a moment. I glance back up at Kaiden and the doctor. Both wearing concerned expressions. 

“Hmm… I better add this to my report. It may-” The doors to the med bay open, cutting off Dr. Chakwas mid sentence. “Oh, Captain Anderson.” I turn and see Anderson’s worried expression fade as he watches me hop off the table and lean against it, arms folded across my chest. 

“How’s our XO doing, Doctor?” Captain Anderson asks as he eyes me with a raised brow. I can’t help but feel like a little girl being chastised. 

“All the readings look normal. I’d say the Commander’s going to be fine.” Dr. Chakwas responds, as if I’m not sitting right in front of her. Anderson folds his hands behind his back. 

“Glad to hear it.” He says to Dr. Chakwas before turning to me. “Shepard, I need to speak with you.” He informs me and then glances at the Lieutenant and Dr. Chakwas. “In private.” Kaiden salutes the Captain. 

“Aye, aye, Captain. I’ll be in the mess if you need me.” He says, his tone clipped and professional. He briefly glances at me with a twinkle in his eye, before he exits the room with Dr. Chakwas following behind him. The door closes behind them and Anderson steps closer to me, placing a hand on my shoulder. 

“Sounds like that beacon hit you pretty hard, Milana. Are you sure you’re okay?” He inquires with concerned filled eyes. I frown as I look down at the floor. My lip quivers, but I refuse to cry. A soldier died under my command. Nihlus was killed. My brothers and sisters were slaughtered by geth and our own dead. This ‘mother ship,’ practically destroyed Eden Prime. And this beacon that I was supposed to find and retrieve, was destroyed. I don’t know about him, but that is a mission failed in my book. So, no. I’m not okay. I shake my head at him.

“I don’t like soldiers dying under my command.” I mutter quietly, not able to look him in the eyes. He lowers his hand from my shoulder and lifts my chin up. He’s stares at me with sympathetic eyes. 

“Jenkins wasn’t your fault. You did a good job, Milana.” He says softly, and give me a small reassuring smile. I still don’t feel 100%, but I smile back anyways. Wait- where did Ashley go?

“Did we leave Gunnery Chief Williams back on Eden Prime?” I ask him. He crosses his arms and leans against the table. 

“I figured we could use a soldier like her. She’s been reassigned to the Normandy.” He informs me and I swear that’s the best news I’ve received all day. I like Ashley. She’s intense, passionate, and brave. There aren’t many soldiers like her these days. 

“Williams is a good soldier. She deserves it.” I agree with him. 

“Lieutenant Alenko agrees with you. That’s why I added her to our crew.” I’m glad Ashley is with us. I can’t help but think how differently things would be if Jenkins were still here. Would Ashley have joined the Normandy crew? A new wave of anger washes over me.

“Intel dropped the ball, sir. We had no idea what kind of a shit show we were walking into down there.” I fumed as I cross my arms. Anderson shakes head and sighs. 

“The geth haven’t been outside the Veil in 2 centuries, Milana. Nobody could have predicted this.” My shoulders droop, as I realize he’s right. This wasn’t anyone's fault. Sometimes, shit happens. 

“Anyways, you said you needed to see me in private?” I ask with a raised brow. He rubs the back of his neck. 

“I won’t lie to you, Milana. Things look bad. Nihlus is dead. The beacon was destroyed, and the geth are invading. The Council’s going to want answers.” My heart sinks little by little, with every bad thing he checks off my mental list from earlier. I straighten my shoulders back and confidently meet his gaze. 

“I didn’t do anything wrong, Captain. Hopefully, the Council can see that.” I respond. He stands up from the table and paces towards the door of the med bay. 

“You know I’ll stand behind behind you and your report, Milana. You’re a damned hero in my books.” He admits. My heart swells and my shoulders relax. He thinks I’m a hero? “But that’s not what I’m concerned about, not really. It’s Saren. That other turian.” He practically spits. “Saren’s a Spectre, one of the best. A living legend.” I knew his name sounded familiar. “But if he’s working with the geth, it means he’s gone rogue.” He turns to face me. “A rogue Spectre is trouble. Saren’s dangerous. And he hates humans.” He says bitterly. I frown. 

“He didn’t come to Eden Prime because he hates humans.” 

“You’re right. Saren has allied himself with the geth. I don’t know how. I don’t know why. But it had something to do with that beacon. You were there just before the beacon self-destructed. Did you see anything? Any clue that might tell us what Saren was after?” I can detect the desperation in his voice. He’s really worked up about all of this. I mean, everyone is… but I can’t help but feel that he’s taking this a little more personally than everyone else. Images of of the what the beacon imprinted on my brain, flash through my mind. It sends an involuntary shiver down my spine. 

“Just before I lost consciousness, I had a vision.” I state as I look him straight in the eyes to let him know that I’m completely serious.

“A vision? A vision of what?” He frowns. I cross my arms, trying to recall what I saw. 

“I saw synthetics,” I begin. “Geth, maybe. Slaughtering people, butchering them.” My stomach churns. Anderson stares at me with horrified eyes.

“We need to report this to the Council, Milana.” 

I scoff at his comment. “What are we going to tell them? That I had a bad dream?” I say practically hugging my chest now. I realize that I’m starting to sound more and more like Manuel. 

“We don’t know what information was stored in that beacon. Lost Prothean technology? Blueprints for some ancient weapon of mass destruction? Whatever it was- Saren took it.” He mumbles angrily. “But I know Saren. I know his reputation, his politics. He believes humans are a blight on the galaxy. This attack was an act of war!” My back stiffens at the aggressive tone of Anderson’s voice. The usually calm and collected man is now suggesting war… I’ve never seen something ruffle the Captain’s feathers so much. “He has the secrets of the beacon. He has an army of geth at his command. And he won’t stop until he’s wiped humanity from the face of the galaxy!” He practically yells as he slams his fist down on the table. I stare at him with an even gaze, remaining calm. One of us has to at the moment.

“I’ll find some way to take him down.” I reassure him. He sighs and briefly glances at the ground.

“It’s not that easy. He’s a Spectre. He can go anywhere, do almost anything. That’s why we need the Council on our side.” He says after a moment. 

“If we prove that Saren’s gone rogue, the Council will remove his Spectre status.” Anderson plays with my idea around in his head. A ray of hope flickers in his eye when they meet mine.

“I’ll contact the Ambassador and see if he can get us an audience with the Council. He’ll want to see us as soon as we reach the Citadel. We should be getting close. Head up to the bridge and inform Joker to bring us into dock.” He says, quickly turning on his heel and exiting the Med bay. My brows raise at his quick departure.

“Yes, sir.” I say as the doors close behind him, knowing he doesn’t hear me. I exhale and lean against the table using it to keep myself upright. I close my eyes and try to focus at the new tasks at hand as the dizzy spell fades. I take a moment to let everything sink in. 

Nihlus’ killer, Saren, is already considered dead in my books. All I need to do is convince the Council that he’s guilty and his leathery hide is mine. Manuel’s words seep into my mind. 

The prophet… Leader of the enemy.

I have a strange feeling that the road to bringing down Saren is going to be a long one. I sigh and begin to walk out of the Med-bay. I look down at the floor as thoughts run through my mind. I rub the back of my neck trying to work out some of the soreness. Kaiden catches me outside of the Med-bay and informs me that he’s glad to see that I’m doing okay. He thanks me multiple times for saving him. 

“LT, it’s fine. Really. I’m sure if the roles had been reversed, you’d have done the same for me.” I say interrupting him mid thanks. He looks down, his brows knitted together with sadness. “Is something bothering you, Alenko?” I ask him concerned.

“I- I..” He stutters, struggling to form a sentence. “I can’t get your screams out of my head.” He mumbles, not able to look me in the eyes. “I think they’re going to haunt me for the rest of my life.” I frown and readjust my stance. 

“You need to realize that whatever happened, it wasn’t your fault. I’m fine. I’m alive. And I actually need to get to the bridge to speak with Joker, before Anderson brands my hide.” I inform him. He chuckles and nods his head understandingly.

“Aye, Commander. Thank you.” He smiles at me. I nod and make my way up the stairs to talk with Joker. Lord, give me strength.


End file.
